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How To Choose The Best Pick Up Line Based On Psychology

The success of a pick up line lies in its appropriateness, whether it sounds rehearsed or natural ...and the way you deliver it. And that applies whether it is the best pick up line ever ...or just an average one.

Saying something like “that dress would look great on the floor next to my bed” won’t get you anywhere (unless you’re trying to pick up a hooker).

So here are some points to consider when saying pick up lines:

  • What's The Setting? A pick up line needs to be appropriate to the setting. So consider the place, situation and current circumstances before you say any pick up line. Something said in a nightclub wouldn't work say if you were trying to pick up a woman at the local bus stop or the library. Rehearsed pick up lines often don't allow for this which adds to their unnaturalness.

  • Say It Clearly: Be sure to speak clearly when delivering your lines. Having to say it the second time not only ruins the moment, but also makes you look like a fool. You might be nervous striking up a conversation with a woman you don't know, so it's important that you speak good and clear rather than quiet and sheepish.

  • Say It With Words AND Actions: Again, the more rehearsed and pre-planned something is, the more you'll come across sounding like a robot devoid of any feelings. A good way to add emotion to your words is to use body language and facial expressions. If you're giving a compliment to a woman; feel the compliment as you say it and accompany this inner feeling with a smile. The result is a genuine expression of a compliment to another person, and she'll sense this when you give it.

  • Say It With Confidence: The very word "con" in con men stands for confidence. They win you over to their way of thinking using their confidence and get you to do what they want. I'm not suggesting you're a con man, but it does show just how important confidence is when trying to get a person to agree with you on something. Therefore, you absolutely must display self-confidence when delivering pick up lines. Otherwise your efforts will be wasted. (Check out my other article: 5 Flirting Tips For Guys With Self-Confidence Issues for more information on this)

  • Avoid Sexual Pickup Lines: Sex is an intimate act and topic of conversation between two people who already know each other. It's not a topic of conversation between people who've never even spoken before. So don't make the woman feel uncomfortable and on her guard against you by including a sexual reference or innuendo into your pick up line. Just stay clear of anything sexual in nature until you've at least already begun a conversation with the person and you've both got to know things about each other.

  • Conversation Follow Up: A good pickup line without a good follow-on conversation is like a movie that has a great start to it, gets you excited but then goes on to be boring. You feel tricked and, well, bored. In my book "THE LOVEMAP CODE: How To Make Someone Fall In Love With You Using Psychology", I devote a whole section to how you can explode your conversation skills (from where they currently are) when talking to women.

So what are some good pick up lines?

You'll notice i didn't give you any. Pickup lines should be pertinent to the situation and to the woman. And if I was to give you generic lines here, they wouldn't be pertinent to either.

You need to come up with your own ...and practice coming up with them on the spot. The best pick up lines are the ones that come from the heart and don't sound rehearsed.

But if i was to give you lines you shouldn't use, i'd probably give you some of the following:

  •  “Hey, don’t I know you? Yeah, you’re the girl with the beautiful smile.”
  •  “This is the first time I’ve met someone as beautiful as you. It’s going to be the last.”
  •  “Hey beautiful… that is your name right?”
  •  “Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?”
  •  “The only thing your eyes haven’t told me is your name.”

And if you absolutely wanted to guarantee failure...

  •  “Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?”
  •  “Your place or mine?”
  •  “Nice shoes. Wanna shag?”
  •  “Shag me if I’m wrong, but isn’t your name Gretchen?”
  •  “Great legs. What time do they open?”
  • “I’m new in town. Could I have directions to your house?”
  • “Are your parents retarded? ‘Coz you’re special.”
  • “Smile if you want to sleep with me.”

I think you get the idea :-)

Initiate Conversation Naturally

And try and make the initiation of the conversation sound as natural as possible. Consider the following to help you:

  • Approach In A Normal Manner: Believe it or not, one of the best techniques to start a conversation is still to say “Hi” once you approach a woman. Be confident, of course, when you approach her.

  • Use A Situational Conversation Opener: You can use a situational starter to initiate a conversation. Talk about the type of music playing, the size of the crowd in the place, something unusual in the distance that you both can see, or something the person just did that caught your eye.

  • Giving an Honest Compliment: It’s more effective to give a genuine compliment rather than reciting pick up lines she may have heard other guys try to use with herself or with other girls. Those won't get you anywhere because women wont interpret a generic compliment as being honest. So instead, try complimenting on how good she dances or the beautiful clothes she’s wearing. If the compliment is realistic - it sounds natural - and hence, you sound genuine.

Need more help?

Yes, what's the alternative to using pick-up lines for women?

How do I show off to someone I like without looking like a show-off?

What are some common mistakes that people make on a first date?

What if I'm not good-lookng enough for the person that I want to fall in love with me?

What's the difference between infatuation and love?