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Can a girl ask a guy out?

Want to know how to get a boyfriend?
And not sure if you should ask him out ...or wait for him to do it?

Traditionally it’s been the guys job to do the asking. We all know this. It’s been engrained into each and every one of us since we were children growing up from the movies we watch to the songs we hear. It’s almost always the guy chasing the girl and trying to attract her rather than the other way around.

I’m not saying this is wrong or right, I’m just saying this is the way we have been programmed to believe things should be. So from a psychological point of view – our psychology tells us it’s the man's role to do the asking.

Therefore if the woman does the asking – what does this mean? Well in effect, this natural psychology becomes unbalanced. And the result is that in some cases, the guy might have an underlying feeling as though the woman is questioning his role as a man and questioning his masculinity. Afterall, he always grew up with the idea that it was the mans role to do the asking.

So I can’t ask a man out?

Yes you CAN ask a man out. Doing so is actually a good thing and is a key component to making a guy fall in love with you as I go through in my book “THE LOVEMAP CODE: How To Make Someone Fall In Love With You Using Psychology.

BUT you shouldn’t ask the guy out in the way you might think.

Let me put it this way to you:

“I wonder what time it is.”

If I was to say that to you during a conversation, what would you say back to me? You’d most likely look at your watch and tell me what time it was …despite the fact I never actually asked you for the time. I was simply stating that I happened to be wondering what time it was.

So in short, you gave me something without me actually asking for it. And this is exactly the approach you should take when pursuing a guy you like.

How to get a boyfriend ...using this information

In short, yes, you will be asking the guy out …but you’ll be avoiding the natural questioning of his role as a man that would have been caused by directly asking him out. Indirectly asking the guy is a much safer bet …because it allows the guy to justify in his own mind that he was the one to do the asking (even though in reality it was you, because you had given the prompt).

For example, you could use lines such as:

  • "I hear that new movie being shown at this cinema is just great!"

  • "You know, I’ve always wanted to try out their pearl milk tea here."

  • "The weathers going to be great this weekend. I should make use of it but I don’t have any plans."

This way, you get the guy to ask you out …rather than waiting for him to do so of his own initiative (which he may or may not have ever done). You’re being proactive, but you’re not questioning his masculine role in the male-female dynamic in the process.

In addition, by using any of these lines, you’re giving him the chance to take the initiative and ask you out and if he doesn’t, you can simply continue the conversation without things turning awkward for the both of you. In other words, it allows you to pursue him without a fear of rejection.

Watch His Friends

Most guys will know it was you who did the prompting, but because it was them who did the actual asking out, it allows them to essentially pretend that they were the one in control. And this is important to the guy. It makes them feel brave, in control and that they were doing what guys ought to do – ask the woman out. Even though he’ll know you gave the prompt, this is a lie he’ll want to believe to himself. Both you and him will want him to believe this.

But if you were to prompt him in front of his friends – THEY might not be so eager to allow him to believe this lie. They’ve no vested interest in the relationship (between you and him) so they will happily point out to him (as guys like to do), that actually it was the woman who really did the asking out. This could either damage his ego or make him think that you’re being too eager. It destroys the illusion in other words.

So when you do prompt the guy, make sure you do it when you’re alone with him or at a time when his friends can’t hear your prompt.

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