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The Right (And Wrong) Way To Display Body Language When On A Date

Body language is a particularly important tool in the dating scene. It's how you advertise yourself basically to both the other persons conscious and subconscious mind.

The thing about dates (especially if this is your first date with this particular person) is that they are inherently nerve wrecking events. You don't know this person (and they don't know you) and you're trying to see if you could potentially build a friendship with this person which could lead to marriage. That's a lot to take in ...and consequently it can show in a bad way in your body language.

So consider the following 7 points, and use them as a guide to keep your body language in check.

How To Connect With People Using Body Language

Make sure you're not slipping up on any of these during your date:

  1. Eye contact: The most effective way to connect with others is to look them in the eye, an important tool in social interaction. Making eye contact as you meet and talk also shows you are paying attention. It conveys your interest in others by looking in their eyes with a warm look accompanied by a gentle movement of the head and a smile. It can make someone feel comfortable and at ease. Beware however of rapidly changing eye direction or shifting eye movement as you will only make your date feel nervous and uneasy.

  2. Smile: Smiling indicates happiness or a friendly attitude. It’s like telling someone “I like you and I am happy to see you”. That’s why when you smile at someone they tend to smile back at you. But if they don’t, they may either be nervous or uncomfortable with your company. If you’re on a date, greet with a warm smile to show that you are pleased to meet him or her. Smiling regularly between your conversations will practically make anyone feel comfortable.

  3. Attention: If you are on a date, your attention span indicates your attitude towards him or her. An occasional nodding of the head and pointing out positive remarks shows you are interested in what your date is saying. However, when your mind wanders or you lose focus while your date is saying something, it may imply that you are not interested and possibly bored. And the same thing applies when you notice it in your date. Even if you’re nervous, you must pay full attention so as to not be sending the wrong impression.

  4. Nervous Disposition: When you’re on a date, try to relax as much as possible. Don’t make any jerky moves or fidget, as it will make your date uneasy. Whenever you feel nervous, try to calm yourself.

  5. Arms Folded & Legs Crossed: Hand and leg gestures can reinforce your speech. A folded arm and a crossed leg may indicate a defensive posture or can be interpreted as a sign of distrust. However, folded arms can sometimes mean that the person is just relaxed or used to it when it’s cold. So always try and take other factors into consideration when assessing body language.

  6. Personal Space: Leaning slightly forward when someone is talking shows that you’re interested. But don’t get too close as it may provoke feelings of uneasiness. One dating rule to remember is to keep a respectful distance because most people don’t like someone too close to them, especially when you don’t know each other that well yet.

  7. Gestures: The movement of the arms and hands can be used to display emotion. If your body looks still and rigid, it may indicate a degree of tension. And it can make your date feel uncomfortable.

Final Thought on Body Language

The old saying "be yourself" really comes into its own when on a date. If you be yourself, your body language should naturally relax itself more. Just be careful that your natural body language is in compliance with the above points.

If it's not, then DON'T "be yourself"! :-) Good body language is a must on the first date. Alot of the persons first impression of you will be taken as a direct result of how your body communicates with them.

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