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How To Get Him Back After A Break Up - What NOT To Do

How to get him back after a break up depends to a large degree on what you don't do rather than what you do do. I've come across many women after a break up who in their eagerness to "do something" to get him back, they actually end up pushing him further away.

You've probably done some of these already. However, if you follow my course of action you should still be able to get your man back because the plan involves making a clean break of communication between you and your ex.

You'll want to cut off communication for 3 weeks. I go through why in my book but as regards this article it acts like a fresh start that undoes any wrong you've done up until now. Getting rid of the old negativity and starting again will make it easier to get him back after a break up.

So how can I get him back after a break up?

First lets examine what you shouldn't do after a break up. If you understand these you'll recognise them when you're about to do them and (hopefully) stop yourself. After being dumped:

  • Don't be too ok with the break up: You want to give him the impression that you're disappointed about the break up but it's not the end of the world. You're disappointed but at the same time you show strength and confidence in yourself and your future.

  • Don't tell your ex how much he's hurt you: He doesn't care. You might be hoping he'll feel sorry for you and maybe give you another chance but the reality is he'll actually be even gladder to be finished with such an insecure woman.

  • Don't blame him for the break up: If they broke up with you then there was something wrong on your part or something wrong with the relationship in general. That’s their reason for breaking up with you and it’s this reason only you should address. Playing a blame game will only further alienate your ex and aggravate them away. If you really want them back, you'll have to bite the bullet on this one.

  • Don't say anything negative about their friends or family: I.E. blaming them for the way things went. Again it might make you feel better, but it'll only serve to further alienate your ex. Now if his friends and family or any other issue needs to be addressed you can do so in 2 or 3 months time when you've got him back. But not before then as it'll only make your bad situation even worse.

  • Don't become a hopeless heap after the break up: Even if you don't communicate this directly to your ex, he might find out from a third party. You want to show that you're a strong confident woman and not an emotional case that he'd have to deal with if he got back with you.

  • Don't make him jealous: There are ways to make a person jealous without it being seen that you're doing it on purpose. This is the way to go. Some girls make the mistake thinking they can manipulate their ex by hanging off another guy. The reality is that your ex will just see you as manipulative and not want to get back with you. Even worse he could go off and get a new girlfriend immediately just to spite you. I go through in detail the right and wrong way to make a person jealous in my book "THE LOVEMAP CODE: How To Make Someone Fall In Love With You Using Psychology"

  • Don't put everything on hold for them: You want to move forward and be seen to move forward. I'm not talking about getting a new boyfriend (I'm definitely not talking about that) but rather get involved in something new. Do an evening course, join a gym or sports club where you're getting out and meeting new people.

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Is that enough to get him back after a break up?

No, the above is damage limitation. It doesn't fix the damage. In truth though, I’ve come across many people who have just been dumped that if they followed the above rules they'd get their ex back. A lot of people that dump their partner have lingering doubts in their mind about whether they were right to dump her and the above can be enough to tip them back to their ex.

If you followed the above advice you'd give yourself a solid foundation of being able to get him back after a break up. In my book "THE LOVEMAP CODE: How To Make Someone Fall In Love With You Using Psychology" I go through the complete steps you should take to get an ex boyfriend back and induce feelings of love in him for you so that he never leaves again.

I give a sample of the information available in the book in other articles on this website. Suffice to say however that the more principals you understand and adopt now, the greater the chance is of being able to get him back after a break up.

Want more info about this topic?

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