How To Increase Your Chances Of Getting Custody Of Children
Custody of children is perhaps the biggest fight a person ever has to face in life. Considering this, it's important that you prepare as well as possible for it so as to give yourself the best chance of winning. Even if you don't win, you will want your visitation rights to be as favourable to you as possible.
Generally, custody of children is decided through a mediator’s negotiation between the parents, rather than being decided though a court process. Mediation is a profession of it's own and their services can be found in the yellow pages of the phone book.
Custody Of Children - Steps You Need To Take
If you can't agree: Understand that even though mediation is the preferred route, it's not always possible to agree the custody of children with a spouse using them. This may be due to a clash of personalities or if allegations of abuse etc are alleged by one of the parents.
Get a family lawyer: If you can't agree custody of children with your partner, you will need to get a family lawyer to fight your case in court. This can be expensive but you don't have much choice on the matter.
Disclose everything to your lawyer: Give them all relevant information about you and your spouse. Give information that backs up your case but also give information that backs up your partner’s case. In this way, your attorney will know how to best approach your case to give you the best chance of winning.
Do what your lawyer says: Your lawyer will give you pointers on things you should and shouldn’t do during the custody procedure. Custody of children can bring intense human emotions to the surface and you'll want to ensure that these don't cause you to do something that would impact negatively on your chances of winning.
Ensure you can pay: If you can't meet your attorney’s bills half way through the procedure, they may decide to leave your case. If this happens it can negatively impact the way a judge will view you and your argument for custody.
Document your life with your children: Keep a record of time spent with your children, things you did, places you went and how much money you spent on them. Also keep a record of any problems that you encountered with your ex in relation to your children. A written record like this in court means a lot more than just you giving your word.
Get references: Get written references from people that know your relationship between you and your children so they can back up your case for getting custody. Such people can include friends and family as well as teachers and babysitters. If these are willing to testify in court on your behalf, it will add a significant boost to your case.
Avoid interference with your spouse: Interfering with your spouse’s access to the children is called custody interference. If your spouse can display instances of this in court to a judge, it may harm your case of getting custody.
Parent "as normal": You shouldn't shower your children with gifts or expensive outings before the court case as this might make you look insincere and look as though you're trying to manipulate the courts decision. Parent as normal and in a way that casts you in a genuine and loving light.
Role-playing: You might have to testify in court. If you're not used to speaking in public like this you may not come across as a confident individual capable of custody of children. Ask your lawyer to ask you questions as though you were in court so you get used to the procedure and hence more comfortable in handling it.
Be truthful in court: If you start straying from the truth in court, the opposition attorney may pick up on this and start cross-examining you to expose this dishonesty to the judge. Even if they don't manage to expose this, judges are trained to spot the mannerisms of a liar. If you're coming across as being dishonest, it will damage your chances of gaining custody.
Stay calm: If you've prepared as best you can, there's nothing more you could have done. Even if you don't win, you won't look back and wonder what if I done this or that better. Furthermore, giving a good impression of yourself in court will win you favourable visitation rights as the judge will want to ensure you remain a big part of the children’s lives.
