How To Get A Parenting Plan That Protects Your Rights

A parenting plan is a crucial part of any divorce decree. This is the system, which both spouses will agree upon that dictates when the non-primal caregiver (usually the father) gets to see his children. It's important to note that a lot of court systems will give you a vague parenting plan with not many specifics attached to it.

The problem with this is that the main caregiver (usually the mother) is essentially left having control over how the parenting plan works in reality. Most parenting plans prepared by a court will stipulate that the secondary custodial parent will have "reasonable visitation" rights to their child or children.

The problem with this is that "reasonable visitation" is not a clear definition. And consequently, any time the ex wife wants to withhold the children from her ex husband; she can use this definition against him. Even if he calls the police and demands he gets his children on a Sunday afternoon, he'll be told he can't and that the main caregiver has the right to them.

Make the parenting plan specific!

If you're worried that your ex might try and take advantage of any vague parenting plan given by a court, ask your lawyer to make the plan specific. And it should be very specific. You should think of a parenting plan as a manual for bringing up your children.

Anything, which you know could cause arguments between you both, should be addressed in this parenting plan so it can be referred back to as a guide in times of disagreement. A specific parenting plan should include as much detail as possible such as:

  • Specific days of the week and times you have access

  • Winter and spring breaks from school

  • How holidays will be split

  • Who gets the children on special occasions

  • List and definition of what a special occasion is etc

While this can seem complex and unnecessary, the truth is that when your ex tries to surprise you by withholding the kids at the last moment, you'll have this reference to back you up. If you didn't then the "reasonable visitation" definition that would be set out under a normal parenting plan would give first preference to the primal custodian.

Parenting plan - Final thoughts

Even if both of you get on well at the moment, there's nothing to say when you both start seeing other people that your relationship won't be strained. The nit picking and back stabbing can creep in in such circumstances and this is when you'll be thankful to have a specific parenting plan to back you up in the courts, if need be.

The more detail a parenting plan has - the better. When you agree with your ex to have the children on Christmas morning but Christmas eve they decide they'll be keeping them - you'll be relieved you drew up a detailed parenting plan to ensure a quick one like this can't be pulled on you.

                

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