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How To Get Back At Your Ex If They've Wronged You

Before you get back at your ex its important to know the differences between:

  1. The anger you are feeling and

  2. The emotion of resentment.

Anger is a feeling used my your mindset to make you fight back for your position anytime it comes under threat. When your mind feels your position is coming under threat, it sends a message of anger to your body to make you fight and take action.

However, anger is capable of developing into something more if it is ignored. Lets say your ex has been really mean to you. Maybe they spread rumours or they are attempting to make you jealous. If you didn't do anything this and try and get back at your ex in some fashion, then your feeling of anger would develop into feelings of being helpless, frustrated and having hatred. This collection of emotions is called resentment.

How does this help you get back at your ex?

As regards trying to get back at your ex, it stands to reason that you need to take action on your anger before it turns to resentment. However, having the knowledge that you have avenues open to you to vent your anger is as effective as venting the anger itself. Knowing you're not helpless can prevent resentment from occurring in the first place. Some schools on the study of psychology endorse the idea of "acceptance". However you'll only be able to accept a situation and be content if you know you have avenues available to you to fight it.

You need to know you aren't powerless; otherwise acceptance is a forced situation rather than a choice. And it doesn't work if it’s forced. Lets take an example of how you could get back at your ex. If your ex started spreading rumours about you then you could speak to your ex in an assertive manner and say "I see you've been spreading rumours about me, if you continue, I’ll spread some rumours back about you" Handling the situation this way lets you get back at your ex by taking away their power.

They will then have to contend with the situation of having rumours spread about them. This allows you to get back at your ex without actually having to resort to the nasty tactics of spreading rumours. The dread hanging over them that you will say something about them will stop their behaviour. Knowing you have avenues available to you is key.

What other ways can you get back at your ex?

In my book "THE ERASE CODE: How To Get Over Anyone In Less Than A Week Using Psychology" I show the step by step process of how easy it can be to move on after a break up.

Key to this is making you dislike your ex. Right now, if your ex dumped you, they are high up on a plinth in your mind. Holding this high image of them is not a good way to get back at your ex. A good way to get back at your ex is to cause your subconscious mind to dislike them. What will this do?

  • It will make any break up much easier

  • Once an ex sees you don’t care for them anymore, it will kill them emotionally.

Holding no more emotions for your partner is the best way to get back at your ex. You probably find it difficult to forget your partner. This is because everything around you reminds you of the good times you spent together. If you hear a song that you both used like, then it will cause you to remember your ex. These are called anchors and the proper use of them can let you get back at your ex.

However if whenever you heard that song, you thought of your exs’ bad qualities instead of the good times you spent together, then you will find yourself thinking of your exs’ bad qualities. Doing this trains your subconscious mind to think of your ex in a negative way and this will cause you to not like them anymore. This is a powerful way to train the mind. Your old partner knowing they longer have power over you is probably the best way to get back at your ex.

Need more help?

Yes, should I make my ex girlfriend jealous?

Can making someone jealous actually make them feel good?

Should I be using jealousy to get my ex back?

Is there something wrong with me if I feel jealous?

How do I use psychoanalysis to get my ex back?