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What causes relationship or love addiction?

I’ve always been in a relationship with someone. 
I can’t stand the thought of being single.
Just the thought makes me nervous.

If the above statements rung true with you ...it might be the case that you are suffering from relationship addiction.

And you're not alone!

Here's why...

One thing that’s very common is that people see being in a relationship and being in love as the “norm”. And if they aren’t in either – then something is wrong with them. Lets suppose an alcoholic has a couple of drinks every night for a 3-month period. He was then asked to stop cold turkey. How do you think he'd feel?

Most likely he will begin experiencing withdrawal symptoms and feel horrible. He has lost something that he was used to and so his body responds by making him feel bad in an attempt to make him get that thing back again. It wants the thing back even though that thing isn't necessarily good for him.

So where does love come into it? When a person falls in love, chemicals are released by the brain receptors into the body that results in addiction. These chemicals include:

  • Phenyl Ethylamine
  • Serotonin
  • Oxytocin

It's these that cause us to feel excitement when with a person in a relationship.

What does this mean?

Relationship or love addiction is an addiction to these chemicals. Love addiction is often misinterpreted as being true love, while in fact it's only an addiction to the feelings you experience while with that person (which are caused by chemicals).

People who often fall in love can be considered to be addicted to love because they don't feel happy when single or alone and need to have the above-mentioned chemicals in their body to feel good about themselves. If you feel down and depressed when not in a relationship, what you are in need of is these chemicals and any nice person could potentially give you these. This could cause you to "fall in love" with the wrong person simply because they cause your body to release these chemicals again ...as opposed to the person actually being a good match for your lovemap.

Again this can cause people to convince themselves of thinking that person is “the one” and their “soul mate” while in reality, it's just their unrelated addiction to chemicals that caused them to fall for that person.

I’m not an addict!

One of the main problems of love addiction is a refusal to admit that you even have a problem. Admitting that you use love and relationship to cover over other areas of your life that you’re not happy about is not easy but it is something which you must summon the courage against and face.

An unhealthy situation where you continuously jump from one relationship to another will ensure that you never recover from love addiction but instead are only covering over it. Giving in to it like this will also prevent you from getting into a healthy relationship - one that isn't founded on a need to satisfy an addiction and a need to feel good about yourself.

In my book “THE LOVEMAP CODE: How To Make Someone Fall In Love With You Using Psychology” I show how to overcome love addiction so that you can permanently get over your ex even if love addiction in itself is only the cause of a small percentage of the pain you are feeling after a breakup.

Was this helpful?

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